five days since I last wrote??
The days are long, the nights are longer, and each day at the moment is a struggle. People say sleep deprivation is torture. It is. That much is true. I am experiencing it, and have experienced it for the last almost 2 years. What is worse is when there is something wrong with your child or children. That is much worse. Much much worse. And even worse is when you don't know what it is that is wrong.
So I'm spending my nights tending to the various needs of the different kids, whether that be dream nappy changes, stopping them throwing themselves against a wall in the midst of a night terror, or simply cuddling because the pain of ear infection is so great, that's what I do. And when I'm not doing that I'm sitting here. Wondering. And waiting.
I am not a negative person. But at the moment I am struggling to find the positives. I love my children and they are my world. Definite positive. And they are great (most of the time). Definite positive. That's all I have. The rest is negative. Oh, except their daycare centre. MASSIVE positive. They love it there and I love them going there, the staff are fabulous and so caring, and it is just a lovely place for them to be.
But yep. That's me. I'm not myself. I think that's why I'm not writing much. Because I don't recognise the person that is coming through in the words.
I can only stay strong for so long. I think that time is up.
I really feel for you. We've been there and done that (and still going through it to a certain degree). There's nothing worse than sleep deprivation, it really is torture and can lead to being in a terrible place mentally. We've got 3 kids 5, 2, and 1 and what I can tell you is that the coughs, colds, sniffles and ear infections get better with age. Each of our 3 have gone through bi-monthly ear infections up until around the age of 2 or whenever they've had a set of grommets put in (whichever came first). Chin up and sending you a big cyber-hug.
ReplyDeleteBtw what happened with the hip scan of your little man? Jacqui
Thanks so much Jacqui. I have put another post with the latest updates. How are things in your world? I do hope it isn't anything too serious. And thanks for the cyber hug :) Right back at ya :)
ReplyDeleteAll good in our world and nothing too serious at all. We call it the 'ham, cheese and tomato' in our household - ears, adenoids and tonsils that cause all of our kids worries!! Once those suckers are sorted out they're all good lol xxx
ReplyDelete